Steps to Take Before Telling Your Spouse You’re Divorcing Them
Recognizing your marriage is ending and deciding to tell your spouse you plan on divorcing them can be a challenging experience—at first. However, if you’re genuinely unhappy in your marriage, you’ll eventually find that taking this step is liberating for all involved.
That said, unless your circumstances require immediately addressing the issue of divorce (for example, if you’re being abused), it’s wise to prepare ahead of time before letting your spouse know about your plans. Doing so can prevent major complications in the immediate aftermath when you break the news.
Before telling your spouse you want a divorce, you should:
Secure a Place to Live
Some spouses are able to comfortably live under the same roof for at least a few days after officially deciding it’s time to end their marriages. However, it’s more often the case that spouses should not be living together at this time.
Don’t hope for the best when planning to tell your spouse you want a divorce. Again, unless you have no other option, take the time to find another place to live that you can move to immediately after breaking the news. Even if you’re simply staying with a family member or friend for a few days, having your living arrangements taken care of ahead of time is advantageous.
It may be difficult to pack all your belongings discreetly before telling your spouse you plan on divorcing them. However, if possible, pack your essentials, as well as any valuable items you don’t want to lose.
Your spouse might be very upset when you first tell them you want to end your marriage. Although they’ll hopefully remain mature, you don’t want to have to worry about the possibility of them holding your belongings “hostage” or even destroying them in an act of retaliation.
Once more, in emergency situations, such as those involving domestic violence, you might have limited time to prepare before telling a spouse you wish to divorce them. That said, if you can, wait to tell your spouse you’re filing for divorce until you have secured enough financial resources to cover approximately three months of your future expenses.
This experience is stressful enough. Not knowing how you will tend to your financial needs after telling your spouse you plan on getting a divorce will only make it more stressful.
Write Out What You’re Going to Say
Your spouse might try to convince you to stay when you first tell them you wish to get a divorce. You must be prepared to stay firm when this happens.
Write and rehearse what you’re going to say to your spouse before you actually say it. This will help you make your intentions clear.
Hire a Lawyer
The right divorce attorney can play a critical role in your life until your marriage is officially over. Instead of rushing to find a lawyer after telling your spouse you want a divorce, hire one beforehand.
At Baghdaserians Law Group, our Pasadena divorce lawyers understand you’re facing an overwhelming experience right now. Our goal is to ease your burdens during this time. Learn more about how we can do so by contacting us online or calling us at (626) 460-9525.